[projectaon] 21votm playthrough
- From: Jonathan Blake <jonathan.blake@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: projectaon@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Sat, 18 Apr 2009 10:37:48 -0700
dedication: It might be nice to footnote who Aung San Suu Kyi is.
acknowledgments: Needs to be updated. We don't need be specific on the
proofreading because Sean Donald did the entire book.
disciplines: "If this is the first New Order adventure you have
undertaken then your present rank is that of Kai Grand Master Senior."
Is this necessary? Or does this seem to imply that you can read the
books out of order? I suggest that we remove this sentence.
disciplines: "all of the New Order Grand Master Disciplines will be of
use to you at some point during your mission" -> "all of the New Order
Grand Master Disciplines may be of use to you at some point during
your mission"
disciplines: "you are skilled in the use of one of the weapons listed
in the Equipment section." Are you _really_ limited to Quarterstaff,
Bow, Dagger, Sword, or Axe?
disciplines: "your original four Grand Master Disciplines, your Kai
Weapon,..." The Kai Weapon hasn't been mentioned yet, so maybe a
footnote that says "Details about the Kai Weapon appear in the next
section of the game rules." Also, it might be good to add to this
sentence the idea that this is contingent on completing the first
portion of the mission successfully.
equipment: "only two of which may be Weapons" Including the Quiver?
equipment: "record them on your Weapons List." And on the Special Items list?
equipment: "then you may add the higher bonus to your COMBAT SKILL."
Footnote: "These bonuses are not cumulative."
equipment: It seems like we need to add some margin to the bottom of
tables in the text.
equipment: "If you have the Discipline of Grand Weaponmastery with
Bow, you may add 3 points to any number you pick from the Random
Number Table, when using the Bow." Wouldn't this be nice to know when
picking your Disciplines? Footnote, or move this there?
improved disciplines: "Lone Wolf New Order series" Should we italicize
all of "Lone Wolf New Order"?
That's it for frontmatter.
--
Jon
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