[etni] Our lying cheating natures
- From: "David R. Herz" <davidrherz@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: <etni@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Tue, 14 Jul 2009 08:54:25 +0300
I can't help responding again. The post by Adi represents an incorrect,
unfortunate and unfortunately all too common, view of human nature. We are
not born into this world as liars, cheats and con artists. We only become
those things as a result of the perverse incentives that place lying and
deception above our natural inclinations. If that were human nature, we
would not "grow out of it." If it were human nature - if it were our nature
in other words - why would we be bothered by it?
My children don't, as a rule, do those things. I don't find that most of
the children I meet do those things either. If we relate to our children as
honest and good, they will be that. If we don't lie and deceive them, maybe
they will have no interest in doing so to us. If you have ever met up with
home-schooled students or the students of a democratic school, you will find
students that have no incentive to cheat. They learn for its own sake, and
like it.
What our school system does though is tell students that numbers that make
up grades are important. How many parents whose kids come home with a good
report card actually inquire "But what have you learned?" We join in the
call for good grades without ever inquiring as to what we are encouraging.
When we, and our system, tell them that the number is important, they will
seek the means to maximize that number. When we, as educators, are doing
our job, our students should be coming home inspired to learn. As it is,
when the school year ends, they have done what was asked of them and think
that they have "learned."
Consider the child, or even the adult, with a special interest in some area,
be it astronomy, guitar, tennis, or any other subject. No grade is required
for him to seek greater knowledge or understanding. He does it with joy.
In my own experience, I can recall the Monarch notes I read to get over in
an English class. It was only years later I actually read those books with
joy. My older sister, on the other hand, only reads when she has to. She
never got the joy of it. My wife, an avid reader from a very young age,
recalls that she was reading a book and when she decided to use it for a
book report, she lost interest in it and never finished it.
As to the research about lying, I don't know about it. My youngest likes to
make up stories. They are fiction, but I don't chalk it up to a lying
nature. It is easy enough to draw the line between his stories and the
"truth."
I think I have made my point. We kill our children's interest in learning
for its own sake, then tell them to go out and get good grades, and act
surprised when they do what is necessary to get them. We tell them to get
the degree, but we don't spend a lot of time inspiring them to learn or
dwelling on honor and honesty and concern for their fellow man. Maybe if we
dwelled on those things instead, and gave up grades, or made them at most an
incidental measure, we might actually achieve our higher goals.
Perhaps what makes us exceptional is simply that we have resisted, or have
been brought up to resist, the many perverting influences that drive our
students to cheat and deceive, but if this was available to us, we should be
able to find a way to bring it forward to our students.
Yours Truly,
David R. Herz
Drh16@xxxxxxxxxxx
drherz@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Have we forgotten our childhood???
That's what kids do, they cheat and deceive their parents, teachers etc. and
we remain hopeful that they don't exaggerate/get caught, or that they grow
out of it at some point.
They do it at university too...and it is a badge of honor according to them
so we might as well accept it as such. I tell them, if you cheated and I
didn't find out, good for you, but don't count on it - and if I catch
you.... G-d forbid...
There are plenty of researchers showing that the lying phase/tendency in
childhood predicts an especially bright and creative child!
Yet, it is our job to "catch" them...
Good luck
Adi
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